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If you add up enough of the ‘little things’ they can make a big impact. Los Angeles based negotiator Andrew Boughton recently shared with me some of the tips and advice he offers as part of his Edge Negotiation Group.He recently contributed to a chapter in the very influential book on nonverbal communication Boughton’s chapter, and much of his work, deals with the nonverbal communication aspect of being an effective negotiator that can easily be summed up into three categories: body language, baselines, and (avoiding the use of profanity used in the title) lies.Next I had chest pains which I thought were strained muscles but it lasted for a few weeks and I convinced myself this was serious.I now have a pain in my left breast and now I'm convinced I have breast cancer and I'm loosing the plot.Two examples include making small talk prior to the start of the negotiation by asking a non-related questions.If the person answers with a “hard no”, you have something to compare it to now.

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Just before I sent them to print I thought they needed a little ‘lift’, a bit of ‘perk’.In clinical psychology, an act is considered self-harm if (a) the person deliberately inflicts tissue damage to his/her own body, and (b) the action is used as a coping mechanism to regulate either negative intrapersonal (anger, dysphoria, feelings of numbness or dissociation, etc.) or interpersonal experiences (seeking attention or comfort, or trying to keep others at a distance).Under this definition, many acts can be considered self-harm, not simply cutting or scratching until blood is drawn, but also scratches that simply leave a mark, pinching, hitting, burning, etc.Don't worry, they very rarely lock people away for self harming and they can't force you to take drugs either. I know because I've been told all this by a professional myself. =)Self harm is defined as anything you do, physical or emotional, that intentionally causes you harm. I do NOT vouch for self harming, but I do vouch for other neutral coping skills for depression and anxiety.Things like holding an ice cube in your hand can simulate the same feeling you get from self harm.Of the seven universal expressions (research has demonstrated that anger, happiness, disgust, contempt, fear, sadness, and surprise are displayed on people’s faces similarly regardless of a specific culture across the globe), happiness is something Boughton suggests to look for specifically.